This weekend Sarah, Lauren and I traveled to Seoul. Sarah and Lauren were going to see a musical while I met up with a friend we have made, Yumi. Yumi and I went to Myeongdong, an outside street market that is super crowded but really fun. The street is lined with vendors who have tables filled with so much stuff from shiny hairpieces, sunglasses, tights, red devils apparel, to the infamous 32 cm tall ice creams. In addition to the goods being sold on the street there are stores that employ pretty women to scream into microphones in color coordinated outfits and props to attract customers off the street. There are signs everywhere, although that is not unique to Myeongdong, that light up the street at night when it is the busiest. It is really quite a sight.
Walking the streets was electrifying. There was so much going on; that is my idea of the perfect activity. My favorite was when little kids would point at me in complete shock. It was so cute. We were told that people were not as friendly in Seoul as Daejeon but the only difference I could see was that every where we went little kids pointed at us! A complete stranger led us through a maze of a bus terminal in a full run, breaking a sweat, so we could catch the last bus to Daejeon (and we made it with two minutes to spare). At first I thought being an outsider would be terrible and isolating but it actually has been great!
Random strangers have bent over backwards to help us. We instantly make friends anywhere we are sitting long enough to have a conversation. If we need anything we just look around and ask someone. It usually starts off with our five-sentence memorized introduction but ends with us receiving excellent instructions because so many people know English. Who knows, maybe Koreans are saying, “Oh those stupid Americans” in their heads but they certainly aren’t acting that way.
Being an outsider has also given us a lot of leeway to make mistakes. Myeondong highlighted how awful my Korean is. I continually wave at people, especially when I say an-nyeong-ha-se-yo (which apparently is a dead give away you’re a foreigner because most people do a little bow action). Even outside of the market I have stepped on those special platforms for eating that you are supposed to take your shoes of before hand. I have been holding my glass all wrong when someone pours for me. Despite all of these little things we are completely forgiven and everyone just thinks it is cute we are trying.
But I really wish I could just magically know Korean. Having Yumi was really helpful in Myeongdong because she could ask for the price, which I can do, however she can understand the answer, which I cannot do. Also on the train, people in wheel chairs hand out products, in our case gum, to everyone on the train in an effort to entice people into buying it. My first reaction was, “wow, they also have free gum on the train, what a place” but Yumi knew that the man was going to come around again to pick up the gum or get money from people. But having Yumi around was just another example of how great being an outsider is. Yumi is a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend and she met us in Seoul, took us to the theater for the musical, took me to Myeongdong, went back to the theater to pick up Sarah and Lauren, directed us back to Daejeon and has been hanging out with us in Daejeon as well. It is so great that so many people are so eager for us to be happy!
I am pretty sure our preferential treatment is due to our American-ness in particular as opposed to just any foreigners. But this has led me to question what I have been defining an outsider as. I will always be American and I will always look different and therefore always get this treatment but will I always be an outsider? What really is the difference between an outsider and a foreigner? I don’t feel like an outsider because I am having such a great time, which conflicts with my mental image of an outsider being sad and lonely. The way I see it, some things are just different here but that doesn’t mean I can’t be included or at least try.
I originally thought the answer to my question was no; one could live here for a very long time, learn Korean culture and language, and become a member of the tribe but I am beginning to think otherwise. To be an American here is to be an outsider. Korea is so homogeneous and there is so much pride that it cannot be fostered in someone who does not have the biological and physical connection to the country. No one will ever look at me and think I belong here. I mean for all those little kids knew I could have been born and raised in Korea but they still were shocked to see me. The difference in Korea is that there isn’t the typical us vs. them mentality when citizens are confronted with something new. Despite how counterintuitive this may sound, Koreans include outsiders. My conclusion is that being an outsider is a physical attribute. No matter how much I may become mentally qualified to join the club I will never shed myself of the label outsider, and I am perfectly ok with that. In fact, I intend on living up my status to the fullest.
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